‘Thought it was my fault’: How students are being harassed, followed and silenced – on the way to school

Each afternoon in Chennai, Charumathi stands by her balcony, phone in hand, watching the street below as school vans and autos pull up one after another. She does not go back inside until her daughter walks through the gate. Even then, the waiting is not over. There is still the coaching class later in the evening – another commute, another stretch of time measured in missed calls and quick check-ins.

“Text me when you reach. Call me when you leave. Share your location,” she said, listing the instructions she repeats every day. “I keep looking at the phone. If there is no message, I imagine all sorts of things.”

In a metropolitan city, often seen as safer than many others, Charumathi's routine reflects a widening anxiety among parents across India. A recent surge in reported cases of sexual harassment involving school-age children has begun to reshape how families think about something as routine as going to school.

A fear beyond school gates

In Tamil Nadu’s Krishnagiri district, what began as occasional comments soon turned into a daily pattern for Lakshmi’s daughter. A group of boys started waiting along her route to school, calling out to her and following her at different points.

“She began noticing them everywhere,” Lakshmi said. “At first she ignored it, then she started feeling watched.”

The harassment continued for nearly two months. During this time, the child quietly changed her routine – leaving at different times, taking longer routes, and pretending to be on phone calls to avoid attention. At home, the shift was visible, but misunderstood, she added.

“She became very quiet,” Lakshmi said. “She would come back and go straight to her room. I thought it was her studies.” She spoke about it only weeks later, after the fear had built up.“When she told us, we realised she had been dealing with this every day,” Lakshmi said.

The family chose not to file a complaint, instead arranging for someone to accompany her and changing her schedule. Months later, the impact remains.“She still hesitates to go out alone,” Lakshmi said. “That confidence is gone.”

In Kota, Rajasthan, a 19-year-old student recalled an incident from her school years that she never reported. Travelling in a crowded vehicle, she said a man touched her inappropriately.

“At first I thought it was the crowd,” she said. “Then I realised it wasn’t.” She froze and did not react. “I didn’t know what to do or say,” she said.

She did not tell her parents or teachers, fearing blame and embarrassment. The incident stayed with her. “For a long time, I thought maybe it was my fault,” she said.

These experiences, brief or prolonged, often go unreported, but continue to shape how children move through everyday spaces, especially the journey to and from school.

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Sexual Harassment: Constant strain for students

For many children, such experiences remain unspoken, shaped as much by fear as by the consequences of speaking up. A Class 9 student in Ghaziabad, Uttar Pradesh, said she avoids telling her parents about uncomfortable encounters during her commute, worried that it would lead to restrictions on her movement.

“If I tell them, they will stop my tuition,” she said. “Or they will come with me everywhere. I don’t want that.” Instead, she said, she chooses to manage it on her own, like many others her age.

In Trichy, Tamil Nadu, another student said she and her friends have developed informal ways to navigate these risks. They share live locations with each other, try to walk in groups whenever possible, and often pretend to be on phone calls to avoid drawing attention.“We are always alert,” she said.

Yet, beneath these strategies lies a constant mental strain like a sense of needing to stay prepared even when nothing visibly happens.“You are thinking about it all the time,” she said. “Even if nothing happens that day.”

Schools see patterns, response varies

Teachers across districts say they are increasingly noticing behavioural shifts that may point to distress, even when students do not speak about their experiences directly. These changes are often subtle, a once-active child becoming withdrawn, avoiding certain routes, or showing anxiety around dispersal time.

“A child who was active suddenly becomes withdrawn, avoids certain routes, or asks to leave early,” said a teacher at a government school in East Godavari. “These are signals that something may be wrong.”

In some cases, teachers say students begin to show patterns such as reluctance to attend school, reduced interaction, or visible discomfort, but linking these signs to specific incidents is not always easy. “In many cases, children hesitate to open up,” the teacher said. “And when they do, there is uncertainty about how far the school can intervene, particularly if it happened outside campus.”

A private school counsellor in Bengaluru said that while awareness around student safety has increased, institutional responses are often inconsistent.

“Some schools conduct sessions on basic safety or awareness,” the counsellor said. “But these are usually one-time efforts. There needs to be continuity and clear systems so children feel comfortable coming forward.”

Parents echo similar concerns, pointing to a gap between policy and practice.“There are policies, but they are not always visible,” said a parent from Madurai. “Children need to know clearly who to approach and what will happen if they report something.” Without consistent structures and communication, many concerns remain unaddressed, leaving children to quietly adapt rather than seek support, parents collectively say.

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Mental Health: A psychological toll

Psychologists say that repeated exposure to such environments of uncertainty can have lasting effects on children. “When a child feels unsafe in everyday spaces like the route to school, it creates a constant state of vigilance,” said a Delhi-based child psychologist. “Over time, this can lead to anxiety, withdrawal, and loss of confidence.”

The impact is often compounded when incidents go unaddressed. “If a child does not feel heard or supported, they may internalise the experience,” the psychologist said, adding that it can affect self-esteem and the ability to trust others.

In some cases, children begin to associate education spaces with stress rather than growth. “You see reluctance to attend school or tuition, not because of academics but because of what surrounds it,” the psychologist added.

Between safety and education

In larger cities, some parents have turned to technology to manage this anxiety, relying on tracking apps, live location sharing, and constant phone access to stay connected with their children. But many say this offers only partial reassurance. “You can see where they are, but you don’t know what is happening around them,” said a parent in Bengaluru.

A Class 10 student in the city said location sharing has become routine among her peers, but does not eliminate the underlying fear. “It helps, but only to a point,” she said.

“If something actually happens, the phone doesn’t stop it.” In contrast, parents in rural districts say such options are not always available due to limited smartphone access or connectivity, leaving them to rely on informal systems of trust and proximity instead. Across both settings, parents say the tools may differ, but the anxiety remains largely the same.

The concern is not limited to schools themselves but extends to the spaces in between — the walk to the bus stop, the shared auto ride, dimly lit streets, and the narrow lanes near tuition centres.

“Inside the school, there are at least some rules,” said Ramesh, a parent from Gujarat. “But outside, it is unpredictable. Children are on their own.”

Coaching centres, now a near-universal extension of schooling, add to this exposure. Many operate in the evenings, often in crowded commercial areas with limited supervision, increasing the time children spend navigating public spaces.

“My son returns at 8 pm,” said a parent from Ghaziabad. “It is dark, there are crowds, and we keep calling until he comes back. It has become a daily tension.”

At the same time, families are grappling with a difficult balance. Restricting movement or pulling children out of school is not seen as a sustainable solution, but the fear remains constant and shapes everyday decisions.

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“Education cannot stop,” Lokesh Charan said. “We have worked hard to get them here. But every day, there is a question mark.” In response, some families are making practical adjustments. Children are being shifted to schools closer to home, coaching classes are being reduced or moved online, and in some neighbourhoods, parents have formed informal groups to coordinate pick-ups and drop-offs.

“These are temporary fixes,” said another parent from Bengaluru. “We are just trying to manage day by day.”

For many parents, however, the issue remains immediate and deeply personal. Each day is divided into safe and uncertain hours, marked by school bells, commute times, and the sound of a phone notification.

“You wait for that message,” a parent from Chennai said. “That one line — ‘I reached.’ Only then you can breathe.” Until the next journey begins.